12.15.06 I can't bake...but, I think I could handle this recipe

We had a Holiday Cookie Exchange at the office yesterday. I was the one that instigated the whole idea and the one who organized it. I sent out cute little invitations on card stock and everything. Well, when it came time to bake my cookies, I had a TOTAL DISASTER!

I have tried baking cookies in the past and they rarely to never work out. They are too big and run together, they taste funny (probably because of a forgotten ingredient or a mis-measured ingredient), they don't cook all the way through, they are burned...pick a reason and I promise I have that one covered.

I waited until the last minute to bake my cookies. I had total confidence in myself and knew that this time would be different. Ha! When I had everything mixed together, my batter was not sticking together. I called my dad for help. He knew immediately (without even looking at it) that I had not added the eggs. Ugh! How did he know that? So, I added the eggs at the end. I also realized I had forgotten the vanilla; so, I added that too. The mixture was already tough to stir so the eggs and the vanilla didn't mix in all the way. I thought it would be fine.

The first batch I baked were too big and joined together to make one big cookie. My supportive husband said, "Just change the name to cakies." Isn't he sweet?

The second batch burned on the ends and were not cooked in the middle. Ugh! My sweet husband said, "Well...they're not too bad". He was smiling really big and trying to be helpful.

I got frustrated and threw out everything. I swore off baking and said I would never try again. My sweet, suportive, trying to be helpful husband said, "Haven't you ever heard 'Practice makes Perfect'? You really need to try again until you get it right." "Not tonight," I said.

I called a bakery the next morning and ordered 3 dozen cookies. Since then, I have found this cookie recipe and have decided to try it. I think this recipe is more my style. :)

Christmas Cookie Recipe

1 cup of water

1 tsp baking soda

1 cup of sugar

1 tsp salt

1 cup of brown sugar

2 tsp lemon juice

4 large eggs

1 cup nuts

2 cups of dried fruit

1 bottle Crown Royal

Sample the Crown to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the Crown again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again.

At this point it's best to make sure the Crown is still OK, try another cup, just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy.

Check the Crown Royal.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit...Pick the frigging fruit off floor.

Check the Crown Royal.

Mix on the turner.

Check the Crown Royal.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a dewscriver.

Check the Crown Royal for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet.

Check the Crown Royal.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table.

Add a spoon of ar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Check the Crown Royal.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, Finish the bottle of Crown Royal.

Make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS

12.5.06 Cooking Mishap/How I hurt my Hand

I was trying to be a good wife and cook breakfast on Saturday morning. I got up, followed the recipe and thought evevrything was going well. I forget the name of the dish I was trying to cook; but, it required me to put eggs, herbs, milk and cheese in a hot skillet and then put the skillet in the oven for 20 minutes.

When the 20 minutes were up, I put on my oven mit and took the HOT skillet out of the oven. I placed the skillet on top of the stove so that I could cut the egg dish into pieces. I took OFF my oven mit to grap a knife from the drawer. I, then, grabbed the handle of the HOT skillet (like you usually do when dealing with a skillet) WITHOUT the oven mit. My hand was not on the handle but for a few seconds; but, I heard my skin sizzle...the handle was that HOT. I immediately turned to the sink and ran cold water over my hand for a few minutes. My skin was not peeling or blistering (too bad); so, I decided it was not the emergency it felt like it was.

There were a few places on my hand that I had to hold ice on for a while before it finally quit burning. My hand throbbed for the rest of the day and was a little sensitive for a day and a half. There are also places on my ring finger and pinky finger where the fingerprints are kind of smooth. I'm tellin' ya...I burned the dickens out of me!!

The egg dish was also a disaster. The recipe called for fresh herbs. I didn't have any fresh herbs so I used dried ones (not reccomended...and I know better). I also used the same amount as the receipe called for (fresh herb measurements don't equal dried herb measurements); so, there were WAY TOO MANY herbs and they all floated to the top to form an herb crust over a soggy-not-enough-cheese-mixture of eggs. I had to throw the whole thing in the trash.

Thank you all for your wishes of fast healing. I am better now. My hand is back to normal...just a little dry where I was burned.